If we’d had a black president when the hurricane hit we wouldn’t be having the same problems. First off, with a black president it would have been over when he signed the declaration of emergency. Everybody knows a black father ain’t gonna be telling you twice. Can you imagine a black quarterback like Republican J.C. Watts calling a two-minute offense and then have to have to wait till his front blockers checked with the wide receivers to see if it was ok. JC would cut off the whole team’s steroids for a month. Michael Chertoff says he read in the paper that New Orleans had dodged a bullet and thought everything was alright. Just think if Chicago Bears coach Lovey Smith had wanted a hurry-up offense then his quarterback didn’t do it cause he’d heard a reporter say it was time for the ground game.
A black woman president would have looked at them old ladies in the convention center begging for food and said “Milvertha! That’s Milvertha! And Uncle Lemmy and Hattie Mae and cousin Latricia!” And while the Marines were airlifting food she might be cooking up a big pot of greens and a turkey to send down herself.
If it had been three days and they hadn’t gotten food, a black woman president would have pulled out her belt and commenced to “whupping” people.
Black woman president have laid Michael Brown over that oval office desk and whupped him till she got tired of it, “You-s’posed-rescue-the-people-first-then-ask-about-the-bueurocracy!” And Brown would be like, (crying) “Yes miz president, yes ma’am! I’m sorry! I won’t do it again!” “I know you won’t!” – whup! Get your sorry butt down there and help them clean up and I want you to personally carry every body bag out of every one of them buildings!”
If we’d had a black president I’m also positive a bunch of white people would be right now be bitterly complaining about all the destroyed coastal residences and how the racist White House had no sympathy for the summer homeless.
No comments:
Post a Comment